I’m Burl Snarkley
And I’m Brat Grumble, and we are here in the Cathedral to Sports built by the taxpayers for the amusement of the One Percent.
That’s right Brat, and we are thrilled tonight to have the Final Four.
Surely you jest, Burl. You well know that this mania will continue into Eternity.
Of course. But this is the big Championship Game. At the end of the day, there will be a winner and a loser.
Not quite, Burl. At this level, there are no losers. Everyone is a champion!
Ri i i g h t, Brat. You say. And now down to the floor to Hanna Hurricane and Cook Cereal.
Thanks, Burl. What do you think of tonight’s game, Cook?
Well, Hanna, it so much reminds me of that season of seventy-six.
(Cook continues blathering for some time, then) Run on over and bother the coach of the Red team, would you Hanna?
Sure! (Followed by Hanna bothering the coach) Now, back to you, Burl and Brat, for the introduction of the teams.
Display of athleticism
Take the floor physicality Remember the center in 69?
Back in the day had a double double must seize the opportunity
execute he lights it up! a true freshman goes to the bench
ramped up defense struggled at the line a little hi-lo off the glass
in the paint the sweet spot will be there all game Bobo is out of Rancho Cuckoo
Halftime: much blathering by Burl, and Brat, and Cook. And Hanna, bothering the coaches.
The battle royal is about to resume, Brat.
Yes! The Red clads take the tip, and
must get it into the paint draw fouls Fires the three! Knocked it down!
elevate using his size a true scholar athlete, carries a 3 point nine eight
in transition couldn’t knock it in Down to the wire!
AND THERE’LL BE A BARN BURNING IN HOOPLAND TONIGHT!